Be careful what you wish for - Bilgola Ocean Swim

Signed up for the Bilgola ocean swim today - on the basis of a conversation with a colleague who joined me in my madness. 1.5 kilometres between the headlands of North and South Bilgola. Cracking sou-easterly wind and more seaweed than populates the gardens of Atlantis (presuming the legends to be accurate).

I, of course, wished for a small surf with infrequent waves. Only had to duck under 4 times to get past the break- and unlike yesterday could catch a full breath between them - but had to run through about 2m of solid seaweed to get to the break. I think I looked like a creature out of Harry Potter by the end.

We started in waves: white, yellow, red and green but by the end we looked like and endless procession of traffic lights. Suprisingly wasn't the last out of the water - being in the first group probably helps with that.

People had warned me that ocean swimming is like organised chaos. They lied, it's just chaos, people swim into you, over you, around you and under you. It's hilarious because unless you are excellent at swimming in a straight line for the 10 strokes between sighting your mark, we're all interweaving like some bizarre version of a maypole dance.

You're protected by the headland for the first two buoys, but between the second and the third you are totally exposed and swimming straight into the waves. Getting a fix is impossible most of the way so I focus on the cliff. And the profound beauty of the vast expanse of water beneath me as the ethereal light dapples and dances on the endlessly shifting sands.

Couple of jelly fish. Unfortunately useless as floatation devices, darn.

Couple of inconsiderate folk breastroke, particularly around the buoys. This is a big no-no in ocean swimming as your kick extends well beyond your body, generally into the person behind you's face.

Made it back through the break, and the seaweed, only to race up the beach. God running through sand is tough. It's like ... running through quick sand. Funny that.

Rescued by parentals and sister taken to lunch. All of whom are convinced they could never do that - I didn't think I could either 6 weeks ago.

Have totally earned dessert so have two. Yay!

Week 6

Swam 2km in my practice swims and 1.9km in my training session. 2.7km doesn't seem quite so far now but it still seems like a bloody long way.

Beach session involved everyone swimming out in waves like a real race. I didn't get entirely overtaken by the fast group but I was certainly the last one in the middle group. Possibly due to hang over (5th of my life). Waves were seriously intense, we kept coming up between sets only to have to go straight back down again which meant I couldn't get my breathing right. Boo. The water was so beautiful though, sun beams came down through the water and glistened on the shifting sands. I kept getting distracted by the beauty and swimming in wiggly lines.

Sighting a buoy that's about 20cm high between waves is a very tricky business, so I decided to sight my fellow swimmers. This is problematic when they're not sighting themselves.

Have signed up for my first ocean swim tomorrow at the urging of a colleague with whom I was discussing ocean swimming. Argh. Nerves. Have also signed up for the Big Swim from Palm Beach to Whale Beach! No turning back now...

Week 5

Finally got the requisite 4 swims per week in that we're supposed to be doing. Starting to feel very at home in the water. Wonder if it's possible to devolve into some kind of amphibious creature, that would be one way to solve my breathing issues.


Swam out to the boat ramp again at Bondi. Serious surf to navigate. Got past the break and then almost got smashed by a freak wave. Utterly exhausting swimming out. One very kind person noticed how terrible my breathing is when I first get started and am totally terrified so she swam next to me so I could just sight her instead of the boat ramp and get my breathing sorted. Not sure if I'll be able to start swimming properly from the get go next week. Ride home wasn't nearly as draining as normal. Must be getting used to that evil hill!

Week 4

Finally kept up in the pool this evening. Didn't get lapped once. Dropping down a lane was a most excellent idea.

First actual ocean swim yesterday! Swam 1km without entirely drowning. Still couldn't get the breathing quite right in the first leg but it kind of came together in the second. Still find it all incredibly challenging but at least I know I'll last the distance.

No sign of sharks. However still swam in time to the jaws theme song.

Week 3

Starting sighting drills at the beach - swimming out and around buoys. Such exhausting work - getting out and through the surf, around the buoys and back through the channel (like swimming on a treadmill) before running up the beach! Swimming such a short distance has never been so exhausted! Afterwards they told us that if the surf ever got that big in the Cole Classic or the Big Swim they'd cancel - this is a relief.

Week 2

Have survived week 1.

Excellent start, I feel.

In Brisbane for work. Buy new sneakers as investment in fitness regime. Bright as daylight by 5:30am. Start running / swimming before work. Swim in baths. Bath temperature. But very, very cute. Unclear why you need a heated pool in Brisbane.

Saturday at the beach. Focus is still on getting in and out of the water. Running over the waves with high knees. Porpoising aka diving over waves into very shallow water. Remember reason for introducing Civil Liability Act. Repression of inner law nerd not going as well as training. Sadly.

Again. Less death than expected. Lovely people, all very supporting and encouraging. Life guards around us at all times. Must not end up on Bondi rescue. Really dislike reality television as a concept, let alone as a guest star.

We have to swim in that?!

Warm up at the Beach

Some of our faithful lifesavers

We have to do what now?

And into the surf we go ...

Okay. I lied. I'm really fine in the pool. The pool is clear, friendly and wave free. I will happily swim the requisite 2.7km in the pool. Just don't make me go in the ocean.

Arrived on bike. Begrudging kudos from the drivers.

Briefing session on Bondi Beach. Two permanent rips. Joy. Talk about overkill. Possibly literally in my case.

Briefing on waves. And the sand bar. Wait, didn't that massive damages case happen here? [Try to turn off inner law nerd whilst surrounded by beach babes. Epic fail.]

Warm up. Beach jog. Wait. I did not sign up to the Can Too run program. I know my limits. Also never wanted to feel like extra on Baywatch.

Time to get wet. No time to shriek about the cold before we are hearded out (like lambs to the slaughter?) through the break. Expected death does not ensue. Can't get breathing together. Swim like they do in Baywatch instead. Give up on hope of never looking like an extra. Very glad I did not buy the red speedos.

Focus on getting out through the waves and getting back in. Do this multiple times without dying. Am again made to run, out of the surf. Seriously. Did not join Marathon program. Very well aware I am not a runner. Breath slowly returns to normal. Then comes hill climb out of Bondi. Swim, what swim?

Splish Splash

First training session tonight. Got lapped more times than if I had swum against Michael Phelps.

If at first you are lapped, perhaps the fast lane is not for you.

Otherwise less drowning than expected. Normally quite fine in the pool. Then started thinking of the ocean. Black line less easy to follow when it morphs into denziens of the deep.

This time for real

Summon courage to send off forms. Finally.

Enthusiasm by proxy

Forms received. Processed. Enthusiastic email welcome email received.

Perhaps all this orange (always the most flattering of colours) enthusiasm will rub off.

Training starts next week.

Uh oh.

It starts ...

Have decided to join Can Too, raise money for cancer and hopefully complete an ocean swim. Scout around fitness crazed colleagues for interest.

Find little to none.

Ignoring the significance of this.